Mandarin #1:    Hey, buddy! You can lower that periscope. I can tell you where we are.

Mandarin #2:   I know where we are. I’m just watching for the predators. You think you’re too sweet to be eaten, but I know different. I see them getting settled in their recliners, looking like they need something sweet and juicy.

Mandarin #1:   What? You don’t think I’m sweet?

Mandarin #2:   No, dummy. It’s because you ARE sweet that you’ll get eaten.

Mandarin #1:   Well, if you think that silly periscope is going to save you, you’d better close the hatch now and “DIVE! DIVE! DIVE!” because here they come – that old couple that’s sick of winter and wants a taste of summertime – that’s US, by the way – the reminder of summertime.

Mandarin #2: So, what should we do?

Mandarin #1:  I don’t know…. Maybe you can scare them off by looking weird when you wiggle your periscope. Maybe they’ll think you have some disease.

Mandarin #2: And what about you?

Mandarin #1:  No diseases here, but I’ve got a plan. When they try to skin me alive, I’ll hold on tight to my skin, naturally, and make it harder for them to do a clean job. Their hands will get sticky, and they’ll get up to get a tissue. While they’re gone I’ll just roll away. Maybe hide under the table.

Mandarin#2:  That won’t work. Haven’t you seen their dog? She’s always hanging around begging for food.

Mandarin #1:  Oh, that. I’ve got that covered. I’ll squeeze a bit of OJ in her eye. She doesn’t like that. Ha ha. I’m looking forward to that.

Mandarin #2:   What about me?

Mandarin #1:  Oh, I think I can spare some juice and squirt you too.

Mandarin #2:   No! Don’t be a smartypants. I mean how will I escape?

Mandarin #1:  Well, like I said, you have that periscope. You can DIVE, DIVE, DIVE.  Then we can roll away into the sunset…well, under the couch, anyway.